Confessions of a sane mind , interrupted.

It matters how you feel at every point.  Every damn minute, it matters.  It combines to reduce you. Or it makes you.  Either way, you can't help but feel.  So darling, when you do feel like you want to end it, please don't. I don't promise you happy ever afters.  I can't assure you that.  But I can tell you that tomorrow won't be as bad as tonight.  I can tell you that there will be nights which will make this night irrelevant.  Every time  that you felt low,  will be compensated for a fleeting yet irrevocable emotion of joy.  It is but the very nature of the universe to maintain balance. If this is your yin , then think of your yang as catching a train back home to you.  Until then, you just need to go ahead.  You need to believe that you can do it.  If you are here, right now, you haven't given up.   One day, if you try and you still can't take it, I will be there.  And I will stand there like a

"Who am I?" Ambivalent. "Why is that?" Because, indecisive piece of shit. Why can't you make a choice? Times running out. Why did they say what they did? Why is it fearful? Is it just me? WHAT THE FUCK? Do I believe in the universe? In God? In religion? In myself ? I don't belong to this time. I SHOULD BEHAVE LIKE THIS. WHY SHOULD I BE ANYTHING BUT MYSELF? But they have their shit together. I love love. BE RATIONAL. ITS TOO CHEESY. I should stop justifying myself. Maybe I swear too much. Maybe they don't really care that much. DO I EVEN CARE? Maybe I care too much? MAYBE I SHOW TOO LITTLE? How is the world so sick? WHAT A BEAUTIFUL WORLD. How can a song be this sad? 'Dead Poets Society' is everything. Why cant it(the universe) hear me? DID YOU SEE THAT?! Nothing is exciting enough. Do I try harder? Do I stop? I have the best people. How can people be such jerks? Maybe I shouldn't be this sad. Maybe

1. My entire college life has been an evolution of me learning to accept my awkwardness after several attempts of failing to get rid of it . Also I pride the fact that I'm super weird. Not every guy gets this. 96% don't. The other 4% have been either friendzoned or taken. 2. I am not the one for small talk. I either talk and laugh and ignore the fact that I'm very audible sometimes or I don't make a conversation at all. I don't want to know 'whats up?'. 3.  Yes. I get mood swings. No . That doesn't mean that you assume I'm on my period. I have expectations. But I dont say them out loud. Instead I pick a small situation and go ballistic on your ass because of something you did or didn't months back. Such a keeper right? 4. If a guy flirts with me, I laugh inexplicably and raise my hand for an up-top like ," Man ! I love that you referenced 'Prince of Bell Air'.  Guy: *blank look* um. What? Me : okay then *walks away* 5. I ha